I watched the dance of moonlight over the water and wondered if I would ever meet her again.
Mysterious and sophisticated are the only words I find to describe her.
We met at the park during a concert. I had a strange feeling when I left the office that day. I felt that something extraordinary was going to happen.
She was standing beside me, enjoying the music. I was thinking about how incredible the music was.
“Yes, that’s right. This is incredible,” she said. I was surprised by her sweet voice and deep eyes.
Suddenly she turned to me as if waking from a dream. She looked at me carefully.
“Why is she so familiar, have I met her before?” I asked myself.
“You seem familiar too” she said.
Now I was shocked, I hadn’t spoken a word.
“Oh, You just did. I heard you, but you couldn’t have met me before…” She paused and looked at me. Her eyes were shining like stars. “I have a strange feeling. Maybe you are…” she whispered.
The music started again and we stopped to listen.
“Maybe I am what?” I asked. “What did you want to say?”
Her eyes told me to be silent. I felt different emotions, uncomfortable because she was reading my mind. I was curious, attracted, and confused.
After the concert, she asked me if I lived around there. I told her that I did and then asked her if she would like to get something to eat.
She grabbed my hand like an old friend although she seemed a little bit shy. We walked toward the tiny restaurant near the water. She was curious about everything and enjoying every moment. I could feel her happiness but couldn’t understand the source of it.
“Where are you from?” I asked.
“Oh, Somewhere a little bit far…”
“What do you do? What is your job?” I asked.
“I work with children. I teach swimming to very young children. Did you know swimming is the most important skill for a child? I am the best swimmer in my homeland,” she bragged, happily.
“I bet your job is interesting and special, isn’t it?” she asked.
“It is. How did you know that?” I asked. She didn’t answer me but whispered I was different and familiar at the same time.
“I am an aircraft engineer,” I said.
She was interested, curious. I explained how I designed complicated systems that could fly. I was proud of my job and tried to impress her.
She was silent for a while then said: “You are the expert of the systems. I am the expert of souls.”
“What is the relationship between swimming and the soul?”, I asked myself.
She smiled. “Oh, I know, but it’s hard to explain,” she said.
I was uncomfortable about her knowing what was on my mind, but couldn’t get past the attraction between us. The moon still danced on the water.
“Can we meet here again, tomorrow? My…” she stopped. Again her eyes shone.
“Of course. May I accompany you to your home?” I asked.
“No, I live close by and I have to leave right now.”
She hugged me for a second and suddenly disappeared into the crowd.
I couldn’t name the feeling that I had. Confusion? Love? No way. I was not that kind of man, but honestly, I was curious to death.
We met again the next day.
“Will you show me the city?” she asked.
We walked until midnight. She was interested to see everything: old buildings, art galleries, restaurants, the people in the streets. We had a lot of common interests although her approach to life was the exact opposite of mine.
“It is fun to explore and discover the city with you. You, my…” and suddenly she changed the subject.
Her answers to my questions were confusing. She was shy about herself. I could see that she was attracted to me and I had the same feeling for her, but she had surrounded herself with an invisible and mysterious wall.
The third night we argued at the park. I asked how she could read people’s minds.
“I don’t!” she denied.
“You do! Why do you talk so little about yourself?” I asked.
“I don’t!” she argued.
“I sometimes know something but I don’t know how I know. Don’t ask me why. There is no why. I know what I know. You can call it a feeling, gut, or intuition, or a combination of.” She said.
“There must be a reason for everything. Try to find out why. Think a little bit. You can easily explain everything by logic,” I said.
“You are a very strange man. How can I explain everything with logic, how do you explain the moonlight over the water by your logic.”
“That’s physics.”
She got angry. “You can’t describe beauty by your rational science. Your definition of the moon is a math formula? Are you a stupid engineer?”
We became silent; staring at the water. I didn’t want to fight with her. She was fragile but strong, quiet, shy, and talkative… a full paradox.
Suddenly she said, “Maybe you are right. I am too emotional. I only see the moonlight as beauty. You can see it differently. You see it realistically, rationally. Maybe I need to learn to see everything from a new perspective. I need to understand your damn logic.”
Her paradox continued to surprise me.
“But you, Mr. Logic, you should learn to feel the beauty of life without trying to explain it. Just let your feelings be free.”
“Your damn logic. Maybe that’s one of the reasons,” she said, thoughtfully.
“What reasons?” I asked.
She changed the subject again. “How do you explain ice cream with your logic?” she asked and rushed toward an ice cream truck.
The fourth day I met her was the last time I saw her. I was addicted to our meetings, still didn’t know much about her. Why was she was so different from others?
Again I had that strange feeling I had on the first day. That night she was quiet and sad.
She brought me a gift: “Open it after I leave.”
I felt worried. She kissed me and told me she had to leave and maybe she will meet me again one day.
She rushed towards the water. What was she trying to do? I got worried. But it was a misunderstanding. She wasn’t throwing herself into the water. She did actually, but I noticed her shiny swimming tail. She swam fast, like a dolphin. Then she was gone, disappearing into the deep.
My heart was beating fast and I couldn’t breathe. The box she gave me was still in my hand. When I opened it, I found a pearl and a note attached.
“Thank you for helping me discover a new wonderful world. I left home, followed the stars as the old legends say, and met you. You, my Animus…”
“Everything is Dual; everything has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; like and unlike are the same; opposites are identical in nature, but different in degree; extremes meet; all truths are but half-truths; all paradoxes may be reconciled.” -The Kybalion
Carl Jung, Swiss psychiatrist, describes the animus as the unconscious masculine side of a woman, and the anima as the unconscious feminine side of a man.
Written by Niusha Payami